SomethingAboutKaren's Xanga

Artfully yours,

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 00:30:52 GMT

I finally convinced someone to be a speech-language pathologist!
Ho ho! The art of my rhetoric is mind-boggling!

Hah. Just kidding. But seriously, though. I am really excited for my friend Michelle.

Speaking of speech, I'm getting the biggest headache trying to find a practicum placement for my final semester. I need to advise Michelle to never send in your request late, even if you claim to not care where you are placed. Because then you will find out that you do care. And you do not want to drive all the way to Mesquite.
I like to pass lessons on.

I had Thai with my roommate, and we discussed all things we wanted to do, the shows we wanted to see. Ever since I visited the new Dallas Performing Arts Center, I've wanted to see a show. Hopefully, I'll get enough people to watch South Pacific with me in December for my birthday! Saerom actually knows someone who helps manage the Winspear, and we're thinking it might be an excellent idea to volunteer as a docent/usher/etc at one of the shows. How exciting. There are so many things I would love to do (but why do they all usually cost lots of money?!). I love adventures.

Speaking of adventures, I cannot wait for the weekend.

Brunch tunes at Breadwinners

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 21:13:21 GMT

Allison: Saerom, will you pass the sugar?
Me: "Sugar, sugar...Ohhh honey honey...You are my candy girllllll, and you got me wanting youuuuu..."
(10 minutes pass)
patio speakers play "Sugar, Sugar" by the Archies
Me, surprised: Hey, did they just play this?!...
Oh wait. That was me.

Mmm...Beautiful Saturdays, beautiful weekends.
Lately, I've gotten these moments when I smile and just think, "Wow. I am happy, thankful, and at peace with my life right now. It's been such a long time."

And it feels so good to finally get here.

You've Got a Rerun (again)

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 03:24:37 GMT

The odd thing about this form of communication is that you're more likely to talk about nothing than something. But I just want to say that all this nothing has meant more to me than so many somethings.

What is it about the Tom Hanks-Meg Ryan connection that makes my heart melt? I could watch Sleepless in Seattle and You've Got Mail countless times, never tiring of the same feelings or the same songs. I think it's the words that seem a little different every time, like something new and sweet and witty that I have to look up online, just like words in a song.

Yeah. I would have asked for your number, and I wouldn't have been able to wait twenty-four hours before calling you and saying, "Hey, how about... oh, how about some coffee or, you know, drinks or dinner or a movie... for as long as we both shall live?"

I also love While You Were Sleeping and Love Actually. I'm such a sucker for these movies and such a cynic when it comes to other, newer romance movies.
What can I say?
It's true love.
And true love lasts forever.

Is there someone else?
No, but there's the dream of someone else...

A question-posed post

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 05:06:39 GMT

My friend asked me--- If there was one verse in the bible. just one that you believe/feel defines what you're about, what would it be?

And here's my reply...

I wish that a Bible verse that defined what I was about! If anything, it would probably end up being from the Old Testament that tells about how the Jews traveling to the Promised Land kept complaining. =X

In all seriousness, what a wonderful question! There are a ton of verses that I like, so I'm not sure that I can narrow it down. It reminds me a lot of the sermon I heard this past Sunday. The pastor said that someone people base their happiness on prosperity or a principle or a saying or whatever else. But the point is to base your happiness and your life on one man: Jesus Christ. I think that is probably why it is terribly difficult to find that one verse that can define it all---we are so complex that we need it all, don't we?! haha but here's my top verses:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
-Philippians 4:6-7

This is one of the few Bible verses I have memorized, mostly because my mom had it written on a heart on our bathroom mirror at home. "Do not be anxious about anything" really confounds me, because who doesn't worry?! I really like this verse because it doesn't say "pray about your worries and God will answer your prayers just they way you want Him to!" It promises that if you truly gave your worries to God, while recognizing that there is still so much for you to be thankful for, God will grant you peace. Even though the cause of your worries might not go away, somehow, if you do all these things, God will grant peace in your heart even if you can't understand how or why it comes about.

God is not a man, that he should lie,
nor a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Does he speak and not act?
Does he promise and not fulfill?
-Numbers 23:19

This verse reminds me of the constancy and goodness of God. He doesn't make excuses or false promises. He doesn't say mean things to hurt you nor does he say nice things just to make you feel better. He speaks the truth---whether it pains you or lifts you up---but whenever He speaks, it's out of whole-hearted and completely pure love that doesn't wane with time or disobedience or reciprocity.

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall.
I will remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.
Yet I call this to mind and therefore I have HOPE:
Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his passions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."
-Lamentations 3:19-24

If you devote your heart to him and stretch out your hands to him,
If you put away the sin that is in your hand and allow no evil to dwell in your tent,
then you will lift up your face without shame;
you will stand firm and without fear.
You will surely forget your trouble, recalling it only as waters gone by.
Life will be brighter than noonday, and darkness will become like morning.
You will be secure, because there is hope;
you will look about you and take your rest in safety.
You will lie down, with no one to make you afraid,
and many will court your favor.
-Job 11:13-20

I love these verses from Lamentations and Job, not just because they're beautiful and hopeful, but because they are beautiful and hopeful and from what can be argued as the "saddest" books in the Bible. When I was going through a particular rough period in my life, I wished that I could be like Job. I felt tortured like him (Sorry to diminish your suffering, man.), but I didn't have that "Yay, boils!" mentality (like Joanne would say) that he did. I wanted to be some sort of strong righteousness that I swore that I didn't have. Anyway, reading these verses remind me of all the hope and strength that I can find while "suffering" because it isn't really in the suffering that qualities such as these are found, but in the surrendering of everything (boils and all!) to God.

If I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
If I give all I posses to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but I have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered.
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
But where there are prophecies, they will cease;
where there are tongues, they will be stilled;
where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
-1 Corinthians 13: 2-10

A lot of people love these verses because they are beautiful and poetic and who doesn't love hearing quotes about love? I imagine that if a person heard this verse for the very first time at their wedding, they would be astounded at how daunting a task Love really is---"Wait, I'm supposed to do/be all this?!" But for all it's loftiness, I love all the implications that this chapter does imply. There is so much more to Love than just love, and it is an awakening that only God can offer this perfect love but we should all hope to give and, therefore, experience this Love.
Ok, and this is also one of my favorite chapters because Lauryn Hill produced an amazing song from it. It's playing at my wedding, thank you very much.

without worry: the secret to Contentment

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 04:28:58 GMT

Going out with friends, wandering Richardson City Wide Pet Day, visiting Yogurtland, making home-rolled sushi, and having great conversations (and a Cowboy win!).
What a satisfying and relaxing weekend.

⁴Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! ⁵Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. ⁶Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

⁸Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

¹⁰I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. ¹¹I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. ¹²I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. ¹³I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
-Philippians 4: 4-13

I had heard this chapter many times before, and in fact I had memorized verses 6-7 (which is no small feat for me), but the words felt new and comforting in church today. I am so thankful to God for everything. I am thankful for my resiliency and for the changes that have risen up within me, even the changes I didn't ask for. He has been my unfailing love all this time.

I owe Him a lot and I can't ever give Him back half of what He deserves.

I've been trying hard now to get into the right frame of mind, and I think that it's working (hopefully not speaking too soon!) most of the time. I still have a lot of questions, but the desperate need to answer them all is waning away. For the first time in a terribly long while(!), I am finding peace and contentment with all areas of my life, even if there are some areas that I do not find happiness (like my part-time job) or resolution in. Does that make sense?
If there's anything that my past life has taught me, it's to let things go. Sure, I can cry and complain when bad things happen and I feel like a victim, but the surrender isn't so hard anymore. It is still difficult, like a lesson I have constantly relearn. But I've been through a lot (and at the rate I'm going, I know that there will probably be so much more I have to go through!), and God has been faithful and I have done a little more than survive.

“Both abundance and lack of abundance exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend...when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that's present -- love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature and personal pursuits that bring us happiness -- the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience Heaven on earth.”
-Sarah Ban Breathnach

Everyone nose that it's hard to say good-bye...

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 04:18:49 GMT

This evening, I removed my nose stud. I miss it already, but I knew it wouldn't last since a career is on the horizon, so why not remove it now? Besides there were several precipitating factors to take it out now, like the fact that taking the stud in and out for football games probably traumatized my nose because it's been pretty swollen and gross for some time now. Or that I have to work around that spot every time I wash my face or put on makeup.

I knew that I would take it out when I started interviewing for jobs because although a nose piercing isn't viewed as rebellious a faux pas as in the past, it's more important to me to be trusted and respected by my patients and their families than to have a little sparkle of self-expression that polarizes people's opinions.

*Sigh* I just have to remind myself that I could always be less vain.

BUT, in homage to my little sparkle and the fun that it was these past 10 months or so, here's some pictures:
On Black Friday, Kat and I convinced each other to get our noses pierced, so we ventured down to Deep Ellum to interview the place I had gotten my cartilage pierced. But sadly, it was closed:

This is me as I am watching Kat getting her nose pierced, thinking, "Why did I make her go first?! Now I'm doubly scared!"

And then as I am waiting, this is what I do. What a dork:

I make Kat and Joanne hold my hands for support. Jenny, claiming that she fears I will kick out from the pain, holds my feet down. I'm convinced that she only does this because she wants to be included. By the way, Christina is the photographer of all of this and Julia is taking a video. It's a hilarious video if you haven't seen it on Facebook. Basically, I'm saying, "Oh my gosh, lying here like this makes me look pregnant! Am I pregnant?!"

And here's Kat and me, the finished products.

It was such a fun event because not only did Kat and I got our noses pierced, but Joanne, Jenny, and Christina got their cartilages pierced. See? Everything is an adventure!

Here's random pictures of my nose and me...You will be missed (my piercing, not my nose---it's still there)

jelfish67 (11:33:40 PM): ah, the things we went through.

karesmatik (11:33:43 PM): hahaha

karesmatik (11:33:46 PM): for BEAUTY!

karesmatik (11:33:48 PM): geez

karesmatik (11:33:55 PM): haha but i'm sad bc it really made me feel like i was cool

karesmatik (11:33:58 PM): sometimes i feel plain

karesmatik (11:34:00 PM): or like a nerd

karesmatik (11:34:08 PM): but then i'd be like WHATEV I HAVE A NOSE PIERCING

karesmatik (11:34:09 PM): WHAT WHAT

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 02:21:04 GMT

Is it still Halloween?
Because I'm feeling a little haunted.

Carving out

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 16:41:50 GMT

I just had a weird thought.
My brother's girlfriend sees my parents more often than I do.
It's not that I don't spend enough time with my parents (I would hope) or that she lives at my house, just that she is visiting my brother and consequently, visiting my parents, and I am living apart from my family now (and most likely always will).
Not good, not bad. Just weird.

On a side note, I'm super excited about Halloween tonight! Too bad I can't go trick-or-treating, though. I'm too much of an adult for that, right? But not for dressing up! I'll post pictures of my costume later.
For now, I've been spending my Saturday afternoon in the kitchen, making avocado shakes and baking Cranutkin bread! It's my first authored recipe, a cranberry nut (pecan) pumpkin bread with an orange cream cheese glaze. I'm so excited about bringing it to my friend's house tonight. I hope everyone likes it! I'll post the recipe, pictures, and response soon...

Thanks, guys, for your support via the www the other day. I complained, I cried, and I got over it. That is, until I return to work on Tuesday...? I just need to stick it out in that job for another semester, then I'm home free!

It helps, too, being in an internship that offsets work. My supervisor, Cortney, emailed me my midterm review yesterday. Even though my summer practicum was a very different experience in the past, I was still nervous to receive my review. To my pleasant surprise, Cortney gave glowing comments on some of the very points that my last supervisors chewed me out on.

Here's some pictures of when my roommates and I carved pumpkins. Saerom blogged about the whole experience in NeighborsGo, so I don't have to, right? It was so funny because they had never carved pumpkins before, so they were surprised how hollow the pumpkin was and how difficult it was to physically carve a pumpkin. What a work-out! But all of us were very pleased with the results:

My pumpkin! Even though it's unbelievably awesome, I have to admit that it wasn't my original idea. I got it from a picture I saw while looking for pumpkin stencils on Google.

Allison's pumpkin is in the middle and Saerom's is the cat on the right. :)

I dropped my pumpkin off at my parents' house last night, since my roommates and I won't be available to hand out candy. Plus, no one can really see our pumpkins from our patio, the way our apartment faces. It needs to be fully appreciated by trick-or-treaters, don't you think? My dad used his new, fancy camera and tripod just to take a picture, haha:

Time is a man-made construct. Just let life happen.

What a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 01:29:09 GMT

I really wish that I had someone who could be here for me right now.

Laaame

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 18:21:47 GMT

Sad. I just realized that I am the only one on the FSA football teams not playing anymore (well except for Francis ) now that corec is over. Everyone else is also on the women/men teams and still have games to play. Boooo the season passed by so quickly...

And looking at Powerpoint slides all weekend is no fun. That's what I get for not paying attention in class/not going to class/not studying earlier.

At least I went to the Colbie Caillat (and Howie Day) concert Friday night.

I really want to do something for Halloween, but I'm not quite sure what that will be. One thing, though, is I am baking for the holiday.

Go Cowboys!